Demigod Conversations
by aboardtheargo
Summary: Aside from talking about battle strategies, Gaea, and all that Armageddon schist...demigods also have slightly normal conversations.
1. The Twilight Forum

**Characters:**

**Percy Jackson, Annabeth Chase, Jason Grace, Reyna, Piper McLean, Leo Valdez, Hazel Levesque, Frank Zhang**

**Let's assume they all survive until the 5th book.**

Percy, Annabeth, Jason, Piper, Leo, Hazel, and Frank were just sitting around in Camp Jupiter, and Reyna was forced to join them. "Jason I have my duties!" Reyna said. "Oh no. You will stay here and bond with us." Jason insisted. Reyna scowled and sat on the grass.

Percy just laughed and shook his head. Stubborn Reyna. He leaned over to Annabeth, who was reading a book. Twilight. "Whoa, since when did you start reading that?" Percy asked. Annabeth put the book down. She clearly didn't like it. "I lost a bet to the Stoll brothers. And this is the most horrible book ever to be published." Annabeth said. "Annabeth Chase? Lost?" Leo said, exaggerating as if he couldn't believe it. "Shut up, Valdez. It wasn't fair anyway." Annabeth sighed. "I've heard of that. It's pointless." Reyna said, examining her nails. "The movie's pretty cool." Piper shrugged. "I hear it's about vampires who sparkle." Hazel said, her golden eyes shone with amusement. "Since when did vampires sparkle?" Frank asked. "The author clearly messed up." Annabeth said, putting it down. "Tell us all about it!" Jason said, sitting up.

Annabeth laughed. "It's a pointless story with no plot." She said, raising an eyebrow. "You seem to be interested in romance." Jason's ears turned pink at that, but he forced a smirk. "I'm just bored." He replied. "Oh if that's the case..." Reyna was standing up. "No! You will stay here." Jason insisted again, pulling her down. "Go on, Annie. Tell us the story." Percy urged.

*ANNABETH TELLS THE WHOLE STORY*

"How cliche." Reyna yawned. "So that's it? What's the plot?" Frank asked, a bit confused. "Nothing! It's annoying. There's always a gorgeous part of Edward's body every two sentences." Annabeth answered. "What about me? Am I gorgeous?" Percy asked, gesturing to his body. Annabeth smacked his head. "You're Seaweed Brain, and I'll never get tired of saying that." Annabeth said. "So why can't Edward read Bella's mind?" Hazel asked. "Because she doesn't have one." Reyna answered. Reyna didn't mean it as a joke, but everyone cracked up. "I didn't know Reyna could joke." Frank laughed. "I didn't..." Reyna just trailed off.

"So why are they afraid of the sun if they sparkle?" Percy asked. "Maybe because they'll make handbags out of him." Leo said. Piper snorted a laugh. "What?" Leo said innocently, secretly hoping he actually made a joke. "I just realized that Bella and Edward...their ship name - Bedward." Piper laughed. Everyone just gave each other a look like, 'What...?' Piper stopped laughing, realizing she was the only one who got her joke. "Let me guess. They all make it to the end of the book." Jason said. "Well I did check the last book...and yes they do. Only two irrelevant characters die in the whole series." Annabeth replied. "Don't insult the series in front of the fans. They're scary." Piper shuddered. "The only character I really liked there was Jacob." Reyna blurted out. Everyone stared at her and blinked. "What? He was the only character with depth." Reyna said, rolling her eyes. "You mean you read it?" Jason asked her. "Yes." Reyna answered. "Since when did you read about romance?" Piper asked, shocked.

Reyna's ears turned pink after a few moments. "I just did." She said, standing up.

As soon as Reyna left, Jason just stared at her. "So..." Leo wiggled his eyebrows at him. "What?" Jason asked, turning red. "So there was a Titan War, you get abducted by Juno, your memories were stolen, we defeat Gaea, you get your memories back and you still haven't made your move?" Percy exclaimed. "Go, Edward Cullen!" Frank cheered. "Oh good gods." Jason said, followed by a string of curses. "Reyna is never going to be Bella Swan." Jason laughed, turning around and chasing after Reyna.

**No hate from Twilight fans please? I'm just, ah, expressing my opinion.**

**Check out my other story too.**

**And review! Review okay? :D**

**Yours in demigodishness. Peace. Out.**

**Okay, so I changed the title and decided to give this type of story some chance. So today is 7/15/12. Stay tuned for chapter 2. :)**


	2. Just Typical For Boys

**Hello there! Sorry if it took really long. I was busy and our internet was down...it was the most agonizing week of my life. Well, here's chapter 2. Hope you enjoy :)**

**Characters: Percy Jackson, Jason Grace, Leo Valdez, Frank Zhang & Nico di Angelo**

Leo was feeling quite elated today. "Hey bro's!" He said as he walked towards Percy, Jason, and Frank who were talking to each other in hushed tones. "Uh, yes, Leo?" Jason raised an eyebrow. "Oh nothing. So what's up?" Leo grinned. And suddenly out of nowhere, a voice behind him made him jump. "Excuse me." Leo turned around to find Nico – thirteen year-old Nico di Angelo, son of Hades, behind him. Dressed in his usual emo outfit. "Don't you ever wear anything bright?" Leo asked, out of curiosity. "Not that it's any of your business." Nico sighed.  
"Nico, have you talked to your dad?" Frank chimed in. "What – oh, no…not yet." Nico frowned ruefully. "Why? Did you and Hazel fight?" Jason asked, a bit protectively. Hazel was like a little sister to him. "What? No!" Frank answered, shaking his head. "Hades doesn't approve of you?" Percy guessed. Frank turned red. "Kind of…he said –" Frank cut off and cleared his throat. "Well, father told me to keep an eye on him and Hazel and make sure that I keep things between them rated PG." Nico continued for him. Frank turned even redder, and Percy, Jason, and Leo burst out laughing. "PG? Seriously? It's not like those two go five thousand miles an hour." Percy rolled his eyes. Hazel and Frank were sometimes shy around each other. (You get it? Well it's not like Hazel & Frank take things fast. =)) ) "Exactly. I don't know. He suddenly pops out of nowhere and gives me the lecture and a litany of things not to do. It was the most embarrassing moment of my life!" Frank threw his arms up in exasperation. "I know how you feel, Frank." Percy patted his shoulder. He really did. He'd been cornered by Annabeth's mom, Athena, countless times and always nagging him. "Hylla almost broke my arm when I tried going a little closer to Reyna…" Jason mumbled. "You mean flirt with Reyna." Frank corrected. Jason's ears turned pink, but his face remained nonchalant. "Well, how about we all sit? I think it's getting awfully hot in here, talking about your lovey-dovey problems under the sun." Leo suggested.

"No thanks. I think I'll rest over there." Jason said, pointing his thumb towards the praetor houses. "Liar. You just want to cuddle with Reyna." Nico pointed. Percy and Frank were like, "OOOOOOH!" Jason just got served.

Jason's left eye twitched. He was ready to pounce any second now and wring this kid in the neck. "You're one to talk about keeping things rated PG." Jason replied, controlling the emotion in his voice. "Heh. Who cares, really?" Nico rolled his eyes. "Pfft. I care. You like my sister." Jason eyed Nico. His pale face turned beet red. "Tell that to Leo." Nico denied. "Mhmm. You too Leo. Well it's not like he has a chance or anything…" Jason turned to Leo. "No offense." Leo exaggerated a step back. "Well excuse me, but I'm the definition of fire, Mr. Sparky." Leo pretended to look offended. Frank winced. "He just said the F-word." Frank shuddered. Nico's eyes widened. "The F-word?" He asked. Well there was only one F-word he knew that existed in the 21st century…

"Fire. He means…fire." Percy said, raising his eyebrows at Nico. "Oh…" Nico trailed off. Well he was kind of hoping to show that he was blending in with today's slang and style. "Oh shizz. I forgot I was supposed to meet Hazel in Pluto's temple. Catch you all later." Nico said, running.

"Any day now, I will strangle him down to the Underworld." Jason clenched his fists. "I've felt the same. But, he's just a kid." Percy shrugged. "Technically, he's older." Jason said. Frank cleared his throat. Age was a sensitive topic in between him and Hazel. "He's like our grandpa's age." Percy nodded. "AH AHEM!" Frank exaggerated the clearing of his throat. "Oh. Hi Frank." Percy said. Frank sighed deeply. "And there goes my feelings." He said. "Yeah, there goes your feelings." Jason pointed.

None of them even noticed that Leo went away and there he was, flirting with Hazel. He would step closer, and make her laugh. Frank's mouth dropped. "Why that little –" Frank knelt down, and slowly, his ears pointed, his teeth sharpened, and he was covered in fur. He transfigured into a wolf. He snarled and ran after Leo.

Percy and Jason were just laughing. "Yep. Defend your girlfriend by turning into a wolf. Completely normal." Percy chuckled. "Speaking of normal, you wanna play?" Percy suggested. "By 'play', do you mean trying to stab, electrocute, and drown each other?" Jason grinned. "Game on."

Oh well. Just another normal day and a typical conversation in the lives of five demigod boys.

**So was it...okay? Nice? Just fine? Please review! Be cool that way. Thanks :)**


	3. Cheers To The Teenage Girls

**So how's everyone been? Sorry for this really late chapter update. I try to make them as hilarious as possible, and at the same time, I'm busy :( Sorry for mistakes, I don't really edit my stories.**

**Characters: Annabeth Chase, Thalia Grace, Reyna, Hazel Levesque, and Piper McLean**

Annabeth and Thalia cracked up. "I'd rather fall accidentally into Tartarus." Thalia said. "I'd rather get run over by party ponies." Annabeth replied, as they walked. And just then, something just popped out of the ground. It made Annabeth gasp and Thalia jump back in surprise.

"Hazel!" They said in unison. Hazel's eyes widened. "Sorry! I still tend to get lot around Camp Half-Blood!" Hazel apologized. Behind her, someone fell. When she turned around, it was Reyna. "That ugly beast needs to be taught a lesson!" Reyna cursed as she stood up and drew her knife. Apparently she was referring to Clarisse. "Whoa! Calm down, Reyna, breath." Thalia said, gripping Reyna's wrist. Reyna scowled and sheathed her dagger again. "Hey, I received an IM from Percy." Hazel said. "Good or bad?" Reyna asked. "Uhh…quite bad?" Hazel gauged the gravity of the news. Reyna only sighed in response. She knew she shouldn't have left those boys in Camp Jupiter. But on second thought, Camp Half-Blood was fun. Being responsibility-free was very fun.

"Dakota put too much sugar in his Kool-Aid. He got so hyper and now he's on top of Jupiter's temple and he won't come down! I think Octavian was hyper too, I heard him singing a horrible soprano in the background…or he was screaming I think, I don't know. And Jason's praying to his father to forgive Dakota and not blast him off the roof." Hazel reported. They all just blinked, not knowing what to say. "…Okay." It wasn't that much of a problem anyway. Then Piper approached them. "Hey guys!" She said cheerfully, then stopped when she saw Reyna. "What happened to you?" She questioned as she scanned Reyna's messy state. Reyna only sighed. "Come on, let's get you changed in Aphrodite's cabin." Piper said. "Nothing too girly, don't worry." Piper added, as they walked.

Reyna came out in jeans and a slightly oversized shirt, and joined the rest of the girls in a circle in the middle of the cabin. "Speaking of doctors, my stepmom's mother pretended to faint when she found out my mother chose anaesthesiology over dermatology as a course." Annabeth was telling Thalia. (I made that up. But that really did happen in between my mom and my grandma ) "Did Frank really turn into a wolf and bite a chunk off Leo's pants when he saw Leo flirting with you?" Piper was asking Hazel. Hazel laughed and nodded. "I saw that too! It was epic." Thalia said, considering Leo had tried hitting on her many times. "Hey I heard Jason wanted to cuddle with you." Annabeth raised an eyebrow as Reyna sat. Reyna pretended to roll her eyes, but deep inside she complained, _'Then why didn't that dope of a son of Jupiter do it?'_

Hazel look around the cabin. "Hey I have a question. How does Ve – I mean, Aphrodite – manage to keep all of her children at a close age?" The rest of the girls went silent. Piper remembered how she wondered about that too when she first came here. Hazel looked at the rest of them and realized how stupid her question was. "Okay never mind…"

"My brother said that?" Thalia couldn't believe it. Her baby brother…growing up…it made her want to tear up. "Nico said so." Annabeth shrugged. She found it believable. "I find it cool. It's like the Greeks have Roman counterparts." Hazel mentioned. "Like how Percy is an idiot and Jason's a lunatic?" Reyna asked. "Exactly!" Annabeth agreed. That's how Percy had gotten the nickname 'Seaweed Brain' from her. "The Stoll brothers once dared him to sound smart for a day, and when I woke up he asked me how my hibernation was." Annabeth said. They all laughed. "Oh gods." Thalia laughed. "And when he tried asking me out, he said, 'Annabeth, would you like to go on an appointment with me to the film theatre?'" Annabeth added. The rest of the girls laughed hysterically, while Annabeth was dead serious. "When he first came to Camp Jupiter, he was like, 'You have a feast…for tuna?'" Hazel said. This time, only Thalia and Piper laughed. The Roman girls and Annabeth were just silent. Apparently this wasn't funny for the Romans. Thalia noticed them not laughing. "Imagine Reyna giving a fabulous speech in honor of tuna then." That made Annabeth and Hazel spit out their laughter.

Meanwhile, Reyna was just silent as the rest of the girls laughed at the idea of her giving a speech in honor of tuna. And for some reason, she formulated one in her head.

'_Romans! Today we are all gathered in honor of our yearly celebration for the Feast of Tuna!'_

And then Jason would continue,

'_For this night, we will be eating all kinds of Tuna – fried tuna, tuna sandwich, raw tuna, tuna spaghetti, and more! Also for tonight will be the showcasing of our tuna monument, and the cutting of the ribbon for the grand opening of the new tuna restaurant.'_

And she would say,

'_We both hope you all have a delightful time.'_

And altogether with the Romans,

'_Senatus Populusque Romanus!'_

That was just ridiculous.

**I hope you guys liked it, I guess? Review please? It would totally make my day :D**


	4. A Godly Meeting

**I decided to upload another chapter today since it was kinda a long time that I didn't update. This one's between the gods this time. then we're back to the demigods in the next chap :D**

**Characters: The 12 Gods of Olympus**

Athena strode down the sidewalk that led to the Manhattan Plaza. Of the 12 gods, why did it have to be Poseidon to choose the place of the meeting? She scoffed at the thought of her rival being in charge. And also at the thought that their children were in a relationship. Athena had tried to get Percy away from her daughter – but failed. Which was ironice. ATHENA NEVER FAILS.

When she reached the plaza, she didn't have to say any name to get past the guard – just manipulate the Mist.

At last, she found her father Zeus and the other gods already seated. The gods in suits, and the goddesses in proper attire for meetings. "Athena. On time as usual. Barnacle beard here nagged me about coming early. See where that got me." Ares sneered as Athena sat. "It'd do well to have what they call a watch on your wrist." Athena replied. "Can we make this fast? My hunters are waiting by the café outside." Artemis said impatiently. "Okay, but Hera is still not here. And according to Zeus, meetings don't start unless Lady Hera is present." Apollo yawned. "My lipstick is getting thinner by the second! She better hurry." Aphrodite said, as she used her iPhone 4S as a mirror. "Oh this isn't enough. Athena please come with me to the powder room." Aphrodite requested. "Powder room? What's a powder room?" Poseidon asked, confused. "It's a term girls use for 'bathroom'." Hermes answered, rolling his eyes as Athena followed Aphrodite.

Athena was shocked when she went in the 'powder room'. It was all pink, and there was a huge mirror right above the sink. But meanwhile, this was Aphrodite's dream bathroom. It even had couches inside. "What are couches doing inside a comfort room?" Athena asked in disbelief. Aphrodite turned to the couches. "What are those for? In case you look in the mirror and faint from your beauty?" Athena asked. As if on cue, Aphrodite touched her hair once, gasped, and fainted, landing on the couch.

The door burst open, and Hera came storming in. "Of all places, why Manhattan?!" She complained, turning to Athena. "This is the place where people spit at you for no reason!" Then Hera's eyes rested on Aphrodite. "Why is there a couch in the comfort room? And what happened to her?" Hera asked. "I had the same question. Then she fainted from her beauty." Athena answered. "Oh for Pete's sake!" Hera complained, walked over to Aphrodite, and slapped her awake.

When they came back, the gods were very bored. As Hera sat down on her chair – MOO! Ares stifled his laughter. Hera shifted on her set. "MOO!" "What –" Hera was confused. "MOO! MOO MOO! MOO!" Hephaestus and Ares burst in laughter. "That's your sacred animal right?" Hephaestus teased. Some mortals were already turning their attention to them. "Hera farts some moo's. Hephy and Ares just laugh. I am so awesome." Apollo just spouted a haiku. Artemis scowled irritatedly. "I got the syllables right, Arty." Apollo said. "Hephy?" Hephaestus questioned. "A shortcut, mashed brain. I was fitting it into seven syllables." Apollo replied. "Arty?" Artemis was starting to get really annoyed. "I, have a problem." Zeus' voice boomed around the table, silencing the other gods. Then he took a deep breath, and turned to Hermes. "You said you gave me the latest iron. Then why are my suits not being straightened out better?" He questioned. "Oh!" The gods complained, burying their faces in their palms. "What about a real problem…" Dionysus suggested. "LIKE HOW I AM SUFFERING FROM ALL THOSE BRATS IN THAT HELL YOU CALL CAMP HALF-BLOOD?!" He yelled. "Would you like to be grounded another 100 years?" Poseidon asked. "I suppose not." Dionysus replied. "Then quit complaining and sit!" Poseidon scowled. "No pain no grain, brother." Ares patted Dionysus. "Um…that's 'gain' Ares." Athena corrected. "Don't care, nerdy." Ares replied. "I don't know about – MOO – you all, but this MOOing from under my chair is starting to get into my nerves! MOO!" Hera practically yelled. "Hephaestus –" Hera started. "You threw me off a mountain!" Hephaestus whined like a child. "And I will never stop until I get satisfied with my revenge! Which will never satisfied! NEVER!" Hephaestus said. Artemis laughed. "He's got a point." Hera only scowled. "You are ugly, you know." Apollo said. "Need you remind me, you conceited arse?" Hephaestus sounded quite angry. "Hey I almost forgot that Hera's sacred animal is a cow…HA HA HA HA HA!" Ares burst in laughter. "And cow's pass gas!" Apollo added to that, and they both laughed together.

"I will need a new order, Hermes." Zeus said. "So you called us for this meeting…all of us…to discuss you ironing problems?" Hermes asked in disbelief. "It is a major problem, if you ask me. Any thing that concerns me concerns the rest of you." Zeus said with firmly. "No it doesn't." Dionysus objected.

"Oh, would you all like me to give you some real news you are asking for? Something that will surely concern all of you, since I 'wasted' your precious time of being away from Olympus having fun while I struggle under the burdens of being the King of the Gods all alone?" Zeus said, clearing his throat. Athena rolled her eyes at her father's exaggeration. "WELL I'M SORRY BUT SOMEONE HAS DESECRATED ALL OF OUR THRONES!"

And surely, that caused a major Armageddon. Okay that was sort of an understatement.

**Sorry if there wasn't much effort in it :/ Sorry if it wasn't that funny for you...I thought it was though...MOO. Please check out my other story too - The Demigod Stage Of Dating :D Make sure to review please! You guys are all cool. By the way, I'm on Twitter! DemigodClass :) follow me!**


	5. Author's Note & Oath

This isn't a chapter, sorry, but…

I SWEAR ON THE RIVER STYX THAT I WILL UPDATE THIS STORY DURING THE SUMMER.

SERIOUSLY.

I'm just really busy right now and I kind of lack inspiration. But really.

Update. Summer. Promise.

It's just two months away.

Please check out my one-shot/s though. Haha :P


End file.
